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I am not the Right Kind of Girl

So I saw something on a Kinky website not too long ago, stating that if you find the ‘right kind of girl’ you should hold on to her because she’ll both fuck you and be there the day after. This to me? Hits my Madonna/whore complex button.

The right kind of girl is one you can bring home to your parents. One who wears conservative dresses in public, is sweet and demure when people are looking, and doesn’t disagree with you when others can hear. AND! she should also wear stilettos, know how to give a mind blowing blow job, fuck whenever (and where ever) you want to, be willing to be kinky as hell, and be willing to engage in any fantasy you can think of.

Fuck. That! REALLY!

I am not that girl. I have days where I am quiet and almost shy in public, sure. I’ve also worn knee high patent leather stilettos to a wedding. I call my collar what it is if anyone asks, but I refuse to call my husband my master just because I wear it. I’ve discussed floggers and kinks with my in-laws, I’ve discussed poly with my friends, but I am not a machine that you put coins in until kinky sex falls out.

I am a person!

Screw the Madonna/whore complex. All it, and indeed the discussion of ‘the right kind of girl’, does is make women ashamed of their desire for sex, or (like me) rage at the double standard. There is no ‘right kind of girl’, there are only women, men, and those who don’t ascribe to either gender.

No one is the right kind. Why? Because ‘right kind’ implies ‘wrong kind’. And what makes you ‘the wrong kind’? Leaving in the morning after sex? Done that, because that’s the type of relationship that both of us wanted. Be loud and brash and open in public? Done that, because I wasn’t going to give me implicit consent to bullshit. Does it mean saying no to sex? I have done that. I will continue to do that. Again, I am not a sex vending machine. Not even for my husband.

That being said? I love my partners. I will defend them, protect them, stand by them, and help them however I can. I love them as best I can, I give my loyalty and my trust.

AND! I’ll do it as a person. Not as ‘The Right Kind of Woman’

Submitted By – Mhari

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